Why I can't update my bleedin' LJ.. and coming full circle.

I could count many, many ways. Not the least of which is that I'm a lazy bum who'd rather sleep in his computer chair after work than type up how his day went. And I stay up late for what? Nothing! I should just go to bed, so that I can update you people on how my lovely day has gone. I owe it to you people, my "fans", to keep things going on in here. Ahh, who am I kidding?

Seriously, though, I need to be more regular about updating, simply because I want a record of my life, and this is the easiest way. I only post 3-6 times a week, and when I do, I try to catch everyone up on the previous days in one bloody post. Not fair. To you guys, or me later on when I try to read these. I want to get back to doing at least one post a day, or an average of 1.5-2 a day over the course of a week.So, somewhere between 10-14 journal entries.

Oh, and I'm going to tone down the RPG element some. I'm not abandoning my "RPG: Silver Marches" posts, but I'm going to quit harping about it as often. I sound like a loser with no life, who is living with the parents. Oh, wait a minute, I think that might actually describe me. Crap.

I was told today by someone that I should be an author. You know what? That made my day. Once upon a time, and many Kroger work days ago, I wanted to be an author. A high-school friend and I were going to write a comic book. (We were in high school at the time, mind you.) We started working on the foundation elements, fleshing out the world, and he even did some sketches. He was the artist, after all. I came up with some basic origins of the main characters. I even came up with the foes. I did what I thought was unique at the time: They weren't "bad" guys, but insane people who believed that they were doing good. There's more to it, but if I told you, I'd have to kill you. :)

I quit school. (Yes, people, I dropped the hell out of school. Stupid reasons, really, and I'll not go into them on a public post.) Suffice to say this much: NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER quit school. You really are doing yourself more harm than good. No matter what you think. I got my GED. (8 hour test, and I took 4 hours to finish it. Sheesh. Am I stupid for quitting, or what?) But, I digress. Where was I? Oh yes! Authors and how I never became one.

I found work at Kroger, and never quite got back into encouraging my creativity. It was probably coming home from work bone-dead tired, and sleeping in my computer chair. Not. I let it slide, and my ability diminished. The old saying goes, "if you don't use it, you lose it." This is so true. I languished in my inability to create anything, even downing myself for "not having a creative outlet". I let one game go because of it. (The original game with Hallis, Jurai, and Ami.) I almost ruined another one because of it. (The Return to the Temple of Elemental Evil game.)*

Ever since I began this new game, though, I've had ideas come flowing in. I've changed the main storyline, changed it again, and changed it back to the beginning. Lather, rinse, and repeat. I've added elements based on new ideas, as well as those ideas of my players. I'm finding my creative spark again, and frankly, I love it. I can feel myself slowly regaining my skill with words. I may not have ishmael02's gift with commentary, or wicked_wish's ability with suspenseful horror, but I am beginning to believe that perhaps, I'm not supposed to. I'm supposed to do my own thing.

Love goes out to everyone. I hope life finds you well. Maybe, now I can post about my day. :)

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* - I know I said I'd say no more about RPGs, but this was in relation to my writing ability, not the game, so it's okay. *smile*

Another update..

After the last post, I almost feel that anything I put here will sound trivial. I'm going to do it anyway, so that I can at least say I've posted 6 times this week.

Yesterday was Tuesday. I bet you're glad I told you. :) I bet you went around, thinking it was Monday or something. *smile* It was, to the point, EVANESCENCE RELEASE DAY! And, yes, as a matter of fact, I did pick up their CD. It is awesome all the way through. I knew I'd like this band. Bravo to them for having creativity (there's that word again) in this day and age.

Sadly, that was the highlight of yesterday.

Now, moving on to Wednesday, I had a rather crappy day. As usual, I woke up at 4am, which is too late to check my E-mail, get dressed, and get to work on time. Fortunately, I was only 5 minutes late. HOWEVER, I had someone waiting on me when I got to work. It was none other than one of the Kroger auditors. Yes, this means what you think it means. I got to spend a lovely morning balancing things with someone who thinks I'm an incompetant, lying thief. Oh, I can't tell you how much fun that is! *rolls eyes*

I skipped breakfast at home, because I had nothing. Once I saw the auditor, I lost my appetite. Strangely enough, once it got to be 11am, I had an appetite again. (It's funny how not eating for better than 12 hours can make one hungry.) I had a sub from Lenny's. I read a little more from Ian Irvine's Dark is the Moon.* I came back to work, where I learned something else.

I had to type up a letter about why I would put the Zone Manager's secretary on a different wage account than the default one. (It's a long story, and involves a lot of the inner workings of a grocery store, so I'll make it brief.) We were not getting proper credit on her hours, so I was listing it in such a way that it wasn't harming her, and we didn't have to worry about credit, since it wasn't an issue at all. Unfortunately, I listed it on "Security", which for some reason, didn't ring alarm bells until yesterday, even though I've been doing it since July of last year. As I remember, the secretary told me I could do it the way I was doing it. Yesterday, she cut me off when I brought it up, and said she would have NEVER told me that. *fume* I really hate being cut off, almost as much as I hate being told I'm doing something wrong.

At any rate, I crafted a nicely written letter, and came home. Once here, I sprayed off my car, which has been in DIRE need of a cleaning for about 3 months now. I also cleaned out the inside of the bottles, cans, and papers I had let collect. I came inside, and... well, if you've read my last post, then you'll understand. I think I'm going to find some dinner, and see if I can't increase my celtic/atmospheric/new age playlist some. I need peaceful music. Oh, and I'm going to bed early, dang it! :)

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* - I don't know why I'm having such trouble reading this book. I loved the first two novels. This one has just been slow to me. I hope to get it done, so I can move on to another book. I won't let myself read anything else until I've finished this one.